Thursday, October 2, 2008

Pizzatatanuggatots


When people are always asking you how many weiners can you fit in your mouth at one time, chances are you're either Takeru Kobayashi (the hot dog eating champion), Disney Kid, or Jenna Jameson. This can occasionally be true but unforgivable also if you're a struggling actor with bills to pay.

"I aspire to have no values. None at all. I'm valueless. That's my value." Truer words have never been spoken. To degrade yourself this far, you would have to have the values of a potato. How does this guy look himself in the mirror in the mornings when he wakes up? "What ever happened to Gary Cooper? The strong silent type. That was an American." -Tony Soprano

What do you think this guy was thinking about during his audition? Okay, lets get in character. This could be my big break. I'm a retarded dragon muppet with butterfly wings. I have terrible eating habits and I want to share them with the world! Yes! I've got my inspiration....Bleeeeeeggggcccchhhhh. I hope this guy gets crossbowed to death and mixed into potions that turn people into frogs.

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